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Friday, December 29, 2006

Tis the season to ... bah humbug.

I do like Christmas. I like the tree, I like the celebration, i like that i get presents, i even like buying presents for people i like.

I hate the bullshit.

In my last week in the Pit of Hell (my prior workplace) i recieved a plethora of Xmas cards in my pigeon hole, wishing me the bst for the new year, and a merry xmas, and blah blah load of shit... because at LEAST 3 of the people who put those cards in my pigeon hole wish me NO good at all.
So excuse me if i say 'tis the season to be a hypocrite and pretend to be a good person'. For fucks sake - if you are going to be an arsehole to someone all year DONT wish them well at Christmas time. be fucking consistent. I dont want your fucking card. ITS IN THE BIN! Its insulting.

I also resent the shops. Its bad enough that the capitalists have hijacked a religous celebration to make more CA$H and that there is an enormous pressure to get everyone presents (i DO like getting presents - and I quite like bying presents) BUT I CANT COPE WITH THE CROWDS OF MORONS. I tend to stay away from places where there are people en masse - on account of them generally being arrogant, rude, impatient and THICK!
And smelly. And Ugly.

And though partly i will admit that leaving my xmas shopping till the 22nd of december might be a bad idea in terms of having to go into crowded places, and deal with crownds of people - it doesnt mean i should have to stand in line with a woman covered in scabs, smelling vaguely like wee, and in front of the mMan Who Stands Too Close. Or the 'Lady' who wants to buy Ill Divo (i think thats what she said) and when told it was sold out indignantly asked 'WHY??' in a high pitched and arrogant screech 'this isnt GOOD enough... this is a MUSIC shop isnt it... where is the MANAGER?"

There was a high point - snapping an ex workmate buying his christmas porn stash in a dodgy little shop in Frankton. It took my a while to click onto why he was making such FURIOUS conversation about bookshops, but i chatted away, unaware of the sealed packages under his arm... and then it dawned on me. It was extraordinarily uncomfortable. I have NO moral objection to him wanking over porn... its just something that is a bit traumatic to think about. Its a visual image i dont need. And neither does anyone else. Having said that - or course it makes a great story!


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